seen in Readers Digest (www.readersdigest.com) September issue

A wife asked her husband to go to the grocery. He said he would and asked what was needed.
She replied, “get a gallon of milk and if they have avocados, get 6.”
The husband came home and put 6 gallons of milk on the counter.
His wife said, “I don’t understand, why did you get 6 gallons of milk?”
He replied, “they had avocados” and walked back to the den.

Two women went into a photo studio to have their portrait taken. The photographer’s very young and very naive assistant asked, “Are you two sisters?”
“No,” said one of the women. “We’re partners.
“Oooohhh…” said the assistant. “So how long have you ladies been cops?”