Spotted on a corporate website where people can fill out comments/requests, etc. was this:

Message: I am interesting in   a Spellchecker for our CTMS system. What is your recommendation?

What are we supposed to do with this?  What is the appropriate reply?  Come on FOCM’ers, reply with some suggested responses.  Perhaps to get you started:

We are most interesting to responding to your question about recommendationing spellchecked tool.
or
We recommending that spellcheckering be occurred not in but out of CTMS.  CTMS nown for bean bad speler.  CTMS come in last at speeling bea.

Found this set of quotes from a meeting which yielded some excellent quotes.

If you quote me, I will shoot you.
– Ulrike Brenner

I’m going to keep my mouth shut, so I don’t end up in the quote show.
– Matt Clacy

This is a quote-free zone.
– Unidentified

Contracts people tend not to be flexible.
– Stephen Breen

Good ring tone Ann.
– Scott Nodolf to Ann Nightingale

Hello, there appears to be no activity ongoing at this meeting, good-bye.
– Teleconference Phone Robot

Do we have and I know we don’t.
– Stephen Breen

Check back for more postings. If your name is mentioned and you’d like it removed, please email me at chris@focmnetworking.com and I’ll give your request strong consideration and may even possibly act on it. Seriously, though I will remove it if you want me to.

Background: This all started at a US Sales meeting and in order to stay focused on what was being said, I started writing down the business cliches, like “let’s circle the wagons”, “let’s table that”, “always be closing” and then count how many times they were said. As I began paying attention, I would hear a phrase that was appropriate for the context in which it was said, but wow, it sure was amusing to see the phrase just sitting there by itself. That lead me to put them into a slide show show so the phrase was seen in its purest form along with the person who said it.  As this practice became known, the slide set became the unofficial and humorous wrap-up presentation, kind of a summary of the things stated over the course of the meeting.

Here is the next in the ongoing series of quotes taken out of context in business meetings:

It doesn’t mean I have to like it.
– Jim Ashby

You’re making the assumption they logged in during the last 7 days.
– Jessica McGeehan

If you want to touch your client.
– Brenda Van Houten

What Andrew said is perfect.
– Mark Matson

That would be ridiculously awesome.
– Paul Colombo

You have to quit and come back to get a new computer.
– Mark Matson

Say something naughty.
– Unidentified

ITG knows the bowel.
– Unidentified

She just needs to get in there and get her hands on it.
– Scott Nodolf

Check back for more postings. If your name is mentioned and you’d like it removed, please email me at chris@focmnetworking.com and I’ll give your request strong consideration and may even possibly act on it. Seriously, though I will remove it if you want me to.

Background: This all started at a US Sales meeting and in order to stay focused on what was being said, I started writing down the business cliches, like “let’s circle the wagons”, “let’s table that”, “always be closing” and then count how many times they were said. As I began paying attention, I would hear a phrase that was appropriate for the context in which it was said, but wow, it sure was amusing to see the phrase just sitting there by itself. That lead me to put them into a slide show show so the phrase was seen in its purest form along with the person who said it. AS this became known, the slide set became the unofficial and humorous wrap-up presentation, kind of a summary of the things stated over the course of the meeting.